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My girl won’t agree to lose her virginity until she’s married. What do I do?

All right, this may be one of my least-popular answers of all time, but it’s going to be honest:

Break up with her.

Let me be clear: I’m not saying to break up with her because there’s something wrong with her. I’m telling you to break up with her because this is something dead serious and you two have a very, very fundamental difference of opinion about it. She feels sex is something that’s better saved until marriage, for whatever reason, and you disagree. I happen to agree with you, but I could just as easily agree with her and give you the same advice. You’re incompatible on something important.

Trying to change her mind on something this serious is, honestly, disrespectful of her and whatever reason she holds this stance. You’ll almost definitely fail to convince her, and even if you somehow succeed, she’ll likely resent you for it. And while she’ll eventually be happy she did break her rule, she’ll take out that happiness on the next guy. Not you. Meanwhile it’s also just as disrespectful to you to hold out for her requirement. You deserve to hold onto your view on this as much as she does, and pretending sex isn’t important is NOT the mature route, contrary to what so much of society likes to claim. Sex IS important. It’s a major component of social and relationship glue and compatibility, and it’s a huge part of a normal relationship.

You also don’t need this affecting how you evaluate her and your relationship. The “why buy the cow if you can have the milk for free?” argument ignores something very, very important: we shouldn’t be marrying someone just to get to fuck them. Marriage implies that your entire connection to that person is worth wanting to spend the rest of your life with them. Sex shouldn’t be the primary component of that. And so if you’re in a state where you’re monogamous to her, not getting any, want it, and the only way there is through marriage, your view of her, the relationship, and your willingness to commit to her WILL be colored by this nagging need to fuck her. And that’s a terrible, dangerous way to start a marriage. And let’s not forget that once you do enter into the marriage you may find out that you’re sexually incompatible. Lots of people are. Can you think of a WORSE time to learn this than the moment you’re legally bound together “for life?” I sure can’t.

Walk away from this idea of trying to change her mind. Nor should you give her an ultimatum. Tell her the truth. Tell her that sex is important to you and not something you’re willing to give up years of just for the chance that you two will possibly have a good sex life once you’re married. Tell her why you don’t like that idea, what risks you think it employs, and admit honestly, and openly, and without shame or regret, that sex matters to you, and that you consider it a part of a good relationship. Make it clear to her, HONESTLY, that you respect her right to her opposing stance and that you have no interest in coercing her into changing it. And tell her that if these differences of opinion are that strong and neither of you is going to change them, nor should you be expected to be, then clearly you two aren’t going to be compatible.

The odds are that she’ll eventually change her view. I don’t think most women who plan to save for virginity ever actually do. But odds are that change won’t come with you. And odds are whoever changes it won’t be someone she stays with. Accept that, and move on to someone who respects your needs and agrees with them.

Ask me anything about sex, love, porn, or getting down.

Would you write a story for me?

I would, and I will:

You’ve teased me all day long. You’ve played coy, pretending to be unaware of the effect, but neither of us is stupid. The number of times you’ve found excuses to bend over just quickly enough to shove your ass against my crotch by “accident,” to squeeze past me while brushing your tits against me, to reach for something and somehow graze my already-hard cock through my pants, to use phrases carefully chosen for their double meanings… hell, using the straw in your glass of water in the restaurant and taking a little too much effort with your tongue before latching on. I’ve seen it all and known it was purposeful. And yet we’ve never been fully alone. I think by design on your part. Building the frustration from the tease throughout the day.

But you’ve finally miscalculated. Because the pool hall we’re finishing up our day at is surprisingly uncrowded, and the way you’ve bent over to take your shots and the way you’ve worked that cue have taken me to a point I have little control of anymore. So when you excuse yourself to visit the single-room, unisex restroom, I don’t hesitate to follow close behind.

I wait outside the door as I hear the water run in the sink, eyeing who’s left in the hall and who can see, but the few players are busy and the bartender’s focused on made-for-cable movie playing in closed caption behind the bar. The door begins to open.

I push it open, shove my way in before you can exit, and bolt the door. Without a word I push you up against the wall and put my lips to yours. You dissolve into me without hesitation.

My hands immediately go to your jeans and undo the button you had just refastened, followed quickly by your zipper. Time is of the essence. My hands slide into your newly-loosened jeans and under the hem of your underwear and I force both down in one move past your knees. Without a word needing to be spoken you’ve already got your hands undoing the fly of my pants and reaching in, searching for, and pulling out my hard cock (always a challenge to slip it out in that state). I barely give you a moment to grasp it before I’ve spun you around and shoved you face-first against the dirty pool-hall wall, bent you over slightly, and slid my cock between the cheeks of your ass.

And that’s when I realize I’ve been set up. You didn’t miscalculate at all. Your pussy’s soaking wet and ready for my cock as though you were expecting me to take you at this moment. And every reaction you gave me further proves the point. I’ve played right into your hands. Or perhaps your cunt. And I’ve never been happier to be manipulated.

I use your lubrication to shove my cock fully inside you in one move, relishing in the sharp moaned exhale that escapes your lips as you find yourself instantly filled. I begin to thrust, hard, as my left hand finds its way up your shirt and around your right tit, and my right hand begins to work your clit as my cock pounds away inside you.

While my goal is usually to draw out the experience as much as possible, in this environment, in my state, and with the time we have available, I don’t have much choice in the matter. I begin to feel my orgasm building as your tight pussy wraps around my shaft and stimulates every millimeter of my sensitive cock. I use all the tricks in my arsenal that don’t require slowing down or pulling out, but soon enough the control is lost and I feel the pulses of wave after wave of cum shooting up the shaft of my cock and deep into the recesses of your welcoming pussy. After the third or fourth blast I finally feel, and hear, you give into the sensations and unleash your own orgasm. The feel of you rhythmically squeezing my cock as you begin to cry out in orgasm just accentuates, and extends my own, even as I fumble to remove my left hand from your breast and cover your mouth to keep the bar from hearing.

And what simultaneously feels like the longest and shortest orgasm in the world finally draws to a close, leaving me to pull out, zip up, and head back to our table while you tidy yourself up to be presentable. But it becomes clear when I get to the table, from the nods I get from the two players nearby and the bartender, that my hand didn’t get to your mouth fast enough. Or perhaps it wasn’t enough anyway. I smirk, nod back, and wait for your return where everyone will pretend not to know you’re playing a little more uncomfortably with my load inside you for the rest of the evening.

Ask me anything about sex, love, porn, or getting down.

Have you ever creampied a girl before? If so how did it feel?

Depends on what definition you’re looking for here. Creampie implies cumming in a girl’s vagina, and then seeing/photographing the cum dripping back out. In which case the important part of that equation doesn’t have that much to do with the feel. And it’s a ton of fun.

But if you’re just asking if I’ve ever cum in a girl’s vagina bareback, then yes, I have. And it feels fucking great. It’s my number one favorite way/place to cum, even if I’m a big fan of alternatives to the point where in my last relationship we agreed that a bare minimum of half my orgasms would occur in her mouth. But that was more because of our dom/sub dynamic. And I’ll readily admit: it was very hard to get myself to pull out and shove my cock in her mouth at times when all I wanted to do was bury it deep and let go. Considering a vagina’s exactly shaped to fully stimulate the penis from top to bottom, it’s generally the most complete set of sensations a guy can feel during orgasm, especially if his partner knows how to flex her internal muscles while he’s cumming. It’s just hard to beat.

Ask me anything about sex, love, porn, or getting down.

Just curious, from a guy’s perspective, what are the best nude poses a girl could send? Trying to mix it up without it just being a huge photo of vagina or tits lol

Fair question, and I agree with the concern. While I DO love pictures that are just a close-up of pussy or tits, I usually prefer those either in porn of people I don’t know, or as something out of the ordinary from someone I do know. Part of the fun of photos of a partner, friend, acquaintance, etc., is the personal connection, and that includes more.

I’d say one definite favorite is from behind. Whether it’s on all fours or something similar, seeing a girl’s ass from behind, pussy clearly visible between her cheeks, and maybe looking back at the camera, or looking at it through a mirror, or something, is very, very hot. Gives me her body, gives me her ass, gives me my favorite angle for closed pussy, and gives me her face, which includes that connection to the fact that SHE’s the one taking/sending the picture.

Also the classic spread legs. It’s simple, but effective. Seated on the floor, bed, whatever, facing the camera, legs spread wide, pussy perfectly visible. Especially if it’s casual. Don’t work hard to overdo it. While I’m happy to see masturbating or spread lips (very), underplaying it can be just as hot.

Otherwise, find some simple poses. Simple is good. On your side, just your ass, POV shots down your body (a personal fave, since they represent an angle I can never reproduce), etc.

And then obviously there’s masturbation. Seems too obvious to mention, but I will anyway. Spread lips, clear finger on your clit, and I can never get enough of penetration. Again, though, simple is good. A toy’s great, but I usually find fingers even better than toys. It’s that personal connection of you penetrating yourself that’s so hot to me.

Anyway, those are just a few of my random thoughts. There’s probably always more, but that should give you a starting point.

There is one more rule of thumb, though: if you think it’s sexy, it’ll show. Take a picture of what turns you on about yourself.

Ask me anything about sex, love, porn, or getting down.

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